Ketcham, the Hunchback

First up, we have Brian D'Arcy James as Ketcham, the epitome of social interaction. This solitary deformed hunchback lives in solitude in the bell tower. Yes, you read that right, he lives in solitude. Because apparently, living in solitude wasn't enough, he had to emphasize it by living in solitude. Genius.

Moving on to Sutton Foster as Boujee, the bibliophilic young woman who seeks adventure. Because what better way to seek adventure than by burying your nose in a book? Oh, and let's not forget that she offers her own freedom. How noble of her. And in return for her father's life, Ketcham saves her from a fire-breathing dragon named The Beast. Because that's a totally normal exchange, right?

But wait, there's more! The filmmakers decided that Boujee, should be unaware of her own beauty. Because who needs self-awareness when you can be odd instead? It's like they took a perfectly good character and thought, "You know what this needs? A touch of weirdness." Brilliant.

And let's not forget Robbie Williams as Blue Peter, the Skye Terrier dog with a sweet tooth. Because what every story needs is a dog that loves to eat sugar cubes and sweets. It's like they ran out of ideas and thought, "Hey, let's throw in a random dog that has a sugar addiction. That'll make it interesting!"